Investigating our Aliveness

Don't be afraid to be a mystery to yourself.  So many times we do things or take certain directions that we don't understand.  It is only much later that we see how that action fits perfectly and inevitably to the overall pattern of our life.  That is why it is so important to be willing to take a chance on our inspiration, our intuition, our hunger.  When we override our deepest desires with 'practical, reasonable' considerations we are not only wasting our time, we are passing up precious opportunities that will not come again.                                                                                          
                                                                                                                                    Reginald Ray



Unfurling petals.  Continuing to breath open to see.  Blooming further into myself, I can't seem to lose this intense itch.  Like decaying flowers -- falling open, or falling about somewhat awkwardly, free from agility, but free and true.  I keep pulling out that string from that unfurling hem.  Pulling out stitches, knowing that my dress is falling apart, but I just can't help it.  I want to see what will happen.  I have been staring for a while at this string and turning away, allowing my ideas of what should be, stop me.

***

I am seeing where my hunger leads.  Making small shifts so I can live in "free"dom all the time.  Serving our peoples and animals with the wild flora and elemental world ~ inherent to our well-being on so many levels.  Practicing listening and being here.  Being creative and loving.  Being decadent and raw.  Being chaos and order.  Sharing.

Learning how to be alive on my terms.

What are your terms of being alive?  
What do you need to feel alive?  

from my boundless heart to your boundless heart . . .

                             

I Love Myself, Therefore...

I have been really loving up positive affirmations.  Louise Hay is the inspiration.  Her book, You can Heal Your Life.  With every page I feel loved.  

I Love Myself, Therefore...has been so good when I start to tell myself I should be doing something other than what feels right.

Like, I Love Myself, Therefore I can go to yoga today and take care of everything else later on.  I Love Myself, Therefore I can wear my long underwear everywhere, even for meetings with strangers, because it feels right on for me and I am cozy.  I Love Myself, Therefore I will stop what I'm busy doing and drink a glass of water or make a nutritious meal. 

Snowy December Greenhouse

The other one I'm into these days is:

I deserve to be.... (fill in)
& I accept it now.  

I have been saying that I deserve to be in healthy and loving relationships and that I accept it now.  I can't say enough goods things about how it is transforming my relationships.  When I start to fall into my old patterns of thinking, old patterns of creating unnecessary drama or tension in my life, I come back to this simple affirmation.  And then I'm back to feeling alive and heartful and feeling so grateful to be a part of it all.  Her book covers all the genres in one's life if this doesn't resonate with you.

Crystallization & Glass Greenhouse Windows

My bedside reading has been poetry from the mystic teacher Kabir.  Born during the fourteenth or fifteenth century in India.  He often wrote on all beings having the capacity to find their own salvation and finding liberation solely through our own immediate experience.  It is within us, someone else does not hold the key to ourselves.

I read this bit the other night on forgetting our inner lover, our truth.  Getting wrapped up and entrapped by a delusional reality ~ by taking on the views of our childhood, our environment, our culture, as our truth.  Even when living is fantastic, this delusional reality lends itself to a subtle or not so subtle tinge of ickiness.  Some tinge of something not being right.  Even when we have the most radiant and blissful of days, there is something in the gut that whispers, "You are not radiant and blissful.  You must worry."  This only small part of the poem is a glimpse of that:

I talk to my inner lover, and I say, why such rush?  

We sense that there is some sort of spirit that loves birds and animals and ants -- 

perhaps the same one who gave a radiance to you in your mother's womb.  

Is it logical you would be walking around entirely orphaned now?

The truth is you turned away yourself, and decided to go into the dark alone.  

Now you are tangled up in others, and have forgotten what you once knew,

and that's why everything you do has some weird failure in it.

                                                                                                                     Kabir

Bunny, in all of his Playful Goodness

Joyful Winter Solstice to You!
May the darkest day of the year
help us see what we are ready now to let go of.
What we no longer need to carry from long ago.
What is not even ours to bear.

And May we welcome the New Light
with deep, unwavering self-love that is always there, complete, no matter how far we stray.

Soul Mate

Sunset, Staatsburg NY.  Getting Ready for a NEW DAWN of being.

Today is the day.  We must empower ourselves to be the ruler of our minds, the person that is in charge of our beliefs.  We need a new language of mental self-love.  We need a language that reminds us that we are in command.  Nobody makes decisions in our minds.  Not our ancestors, not our partners, not our children, not our bosses or friends.  WE ARE IT.

Let us behold the luminous light of each other and ourselves.  And the boundless, radiant, indescribable light that we are ~ will certainly become familiar once again.  We will remember our dearest of friends.  Our true soul mate: our light.

When we connect with other light beings, it will be filled with awe.  We can connect with each other from this place and simply feel good.  Feel life's depth, life's wildness, feel life's aliveness.

May we walk this path together and inspire each other 
to walk in our own unimaginable light and in deep love.